Ep. 230 How Exercise Reduces Anxiety and Stress in Midlife—and the Mindset That Will Make Exercising Easier

Why does exercise start to feel harder, more exhausting, or more discouraging in midlife?
You’re not imagining it, and you’re not alone—your body and nervous system are responding to real changes.
In this episode, you’ll discover:
1.    Why your  exercise mindset can increase anxiety and make movement feel harder in midlife
2.    How new science helps explain what’s changing in your body—and why intensity and pressure often backfire
3.    How simple coping skills and an updated mindset can support your health while helping you feel calmer and more motivated
 Take 11 minutes to understand your midlife body, reduce exercise-related anxiety, and learn a more supportive way to move—you’re worth it.

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About the Host:
MJ Murray Vachon LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with more than 48,000 hours of therapy sessions and 31 years of experience teaching her Mental Wellness curriculum, Inner Challenge. Four years ago she overcame her fear of technology to create a podcast that integrated her vast clinical experience and practical wisdom of cultivating mental wellness using the latest information from neuroscience. MJ was Social Worker of the Year in 2011 for Region 2/IN.

Creating Midlife Calm is a podcast designed to guide you through the challenges of midlife, tackling issues like anxiety, low self-esteem, feeling unworthy, procrastination, and isolation, while offering strategies for improving relationships, family support, emotional wellbeing, mental wellness, and parenting, with a focus on mindfulness, stress management, coping skills, and personal growth to stop rumination, overthinking, and increase confidence through self-care, emotional healing, and mental health support.

Transcript

MJ Murray Vachon LCSW: 0:14

In this episode, you'll discover why exercise feels harder in midlife, and one shift and one mindset shift. In this episode, you'll discover why exercise feels harder in midlife, and how one mindset shift can make a real difference. Welcome to the podcast. This January we're looking at New Year's resolutions through two very different lenses, the Good Life mindset and the abundant Life mindset. And today, the resolution we're taking on is. Exercise. The good life turns exercise into pressure and judgment. The abundant life turns movement into support and protection. I often joke, there are only two kinds of people in the world when it comes to exercise. Those who love it and those who really don't. Whether you love it, hate it, or somewhere in between. Welcome. This episode is for everybody because when it comes to exercise, you might be really surprised with what you're gonna learn today because whether exercise feels like your happy place or your biggest source of guilt, midlife tends to change the relationship. What used to work doesn't work the same way. What used to feel motivating can start to feel exhausting. What used to give results can now actually cause problems, and many people quietly wonder what is happening to me. In this episode, you'll discover in this episode. In this episode you'll discover. In this episode you'll discover. In this episode, you'll discover why they, why the way you were taught to think about exercise may actually be making it harder. In midlife what science, especially research focused on midlife women, is helping. How science, especially research focused on midlife women, helps explain this shift and how the abundant life mindset and how an abundant life approach and how an abundant life approach to movement can make exercise feel more supportive. And sustainable. And we'll end with a simple Inner Challenge to help you begin to reframe exercise in a way that works with your midlife body, not against it. So let's start here. When it comes to exercise. When it comes to exercise, the problem in midlife is your mindset, not you. Most of most of us were raised, most of us were raised with what I call the good life exercise mindset. It sounds something like this. You push harder, you earn your rest, you go all or nothing. You prove you're disciplined. Exercise becomes something you do to yourself rather than something you do for yourself. Exercise becomes something you do to yourself rather than something you do for yourself. For a while, especially when you're younger, that mindset can work. Your body recovers faster. Stress bounces off more easily. You can muscle through. But in midlife, this approach often breaks down. Not because you're lazy, not because you've lost willpower, but because your body has changed. This is where I want to offer some relief. Your body isn't resisting exercise. It's asking for a different approach. It's asking for a different approach. I see this all the time. Someone tells me they should be exercising more, but the moment they think about it. They already feel tired, guilty or behind Exercise hasn't even happened yet and the pressure is already be, exercise hasn't even happened yet and the pressure is already there. And let's be honest, who feels motivated when the mindset is, and let's be honest, who feels motivated when the mindset is I'm already so far behind. And let's be honest, who feels motivated when the mindset is I'm already too far behind, or nothing I do is ever enough. Almost everyone in midlife knows exercise matters, but the template in your head is often a college student or that relative who runs marathons. You are not 20 anymore, and you don't need to run marathons to give your body the movement it needs. You're not 20 anymore, and you don't need to run marathons to give your body the movement it needs in midlife. And this is where the science becomes incredibly validating. There's an exercise physiologist named Dr. Stacy Sims and what makes her unusual and imp and what makes her an unusual and important voice is that she focuses specifically on midlife women. Her work challenges, the longstanding assumption that women are just simply smaller versions of men. What her research and the growing body of midlife exercise, what her research, as well as the growing body of midlife exercise science explains is this, recovery takes longer. Now, chronic intense cardio can raise stress hormones. Chronic intense cardio can raise stress hormones instead of lowering them, which risks weight gain. Strength and consistency matter more than sheer intensity, meaning regularly using your muscles in everyday ways like standing, carrying, pushing, or balancing helps your body far more than the occasional all out workout and importantly, movement in midlife. Isn't just about appearance or weight. Research shows that regular physical activity in midlife Is associated with significantly lower risks of cognitive decline and dementia later in life. And right after that, it's worth saying this plainly. Exercise is also one of the most reliable science-backed ways to reduce anxiety and stress. And that's what creating midlife calm is all about. It helps, it helps your brain regulate. Exercise helps your brain regulate mood. It lowers baseline tension in the body, and it gives your nervous system a healthy way to discharge stress. In other words, movement doesn't just protect your future brain. It can help you feel calmer in your light. It helps you feel calmer in your life right now. That's not meant to create guilt, urgency, or fear. It's meant to reframe exercise. As protective, not punishing. This science doesn't say do more. It says, do what actually supports your body right now. In other words, the science explains why the old rules stopped working. In other words, the science explains, in other words, the science explains why the old rules stopped working. I've seen this many times in my office. A motivated, capable, midlifer signs up for a gym and jumps straight into bootcamp, P 90 X or some high intensity program designed for a 25-year-old body. At first, they feel proud. They're showing up and they're doing the hard thing. But about two months in, they come back confused and discouraged instead of losing weight. Or even maintaining, they've gained weight and that's the opposite of what they were trying to do. And I don't mean they've gained that two or three pounds of muscle mass. They've actually gained 10, 15 pounds. It doesn't make sense to them. They're working harder than ever. But once you understand the newer science of midlife physiology, it makes perfect sense. The intensity overwhelms the nervous system. Recovery can't keep up, and the stress hormones rise instead of settling. I often suggest that they ask the pro. I often, I often suggest, I often suggest that they ask whether the program is truly designed for midlife bodies. The answer is almost always yes because the science, because this new science hasn't fully reached the fitness culture yet, but the results tell a very different story. And when exercise increases stress instead of regulating it, anxiety goes up and the body stops cooperating. This is where I want to take the lead and translate the science into something emotionally usable. The abundant life approach to exercise isn't about doing less. It's about doing what helps. Here are a few guiding principles. First exercise becomes protection, not punishment. Movement is about protecting your future brain, bones, and independence, not fixing or shrinking your body. Second, consistency matters more than intensity, repeatable movement. Beats heroic effort every time in midlife. This takes enormous pressure off, and third, recovery and strengths. And third, recovery and strength are signs of wisdom, not weakness. Rest isn't something you earn. Strength isn't about lifting heavy. It's about preserving what supports you. These principles don't demand motivation. These principles don't demand motivation. They invite cooperation. I worked with a midlife woman who had never exercised. Let me share a story from the couch. I worked with a midlife woman who had never exercised and struggled with severe panic attacks and anxiety. When I shared how movement can help calm her nervous system, she immediately said, there is no way I am running to, there's no way I'm running a 10 K MJ. I laughed and I said, me neither. Then I invited her to think about exercise as a continuum from walking or biking to gentle bouncing to strength work movement. Doesn't have to look extreme to be effective. She paused and she said. I just inherited my father's mini trampoline. When he moved into the retirement home, she assumed it wouldn't count because if she assumed it couldn't count as exercise because it felt too fun, but it met all three of her criteria. It was free. It was free. She could do it at home. While she was watching tv, I told her, you're in midlife. You deserve exercise. That actually feels supportive. And yes, it gets to be fun. That's the abundant life shift choosing movement. Your body will. Actually cooperate with instead of dread. I work with a lot of midlife people who say I walk. That's about it. Often with an apologetic tone, like walking doesn't really count, but walking absolutely matters. It supports your mood, your heart, and your stress levels. Where people get discouraged is when they expect walking alone to do. Everything, balance or brief effort. If walking is your foundation, adding a little strength, balance or brief effort, even just a few minutes at a time, even just a few minutes at a time, support your body in ways that walking can't I actually added the tree pose to my teeth brushing each night. I know I'm not going to yoga, but brushing my teeth while doing the tree pose, but brushing my teeth while doing the tree pose, but brushing my teeth while doing the tree pose actually helps me build a little bit of strength. Actually helps me build strength. It's small, but it counts. Before we close, I want to speak directly to anyone who feels intimidated by strength training or exercise in general. You don't have to love it. You don't have to do it perfectly, and you don't have to overhaul your life. The science supports something surprisingly humane. A minimum effective dose done consistently makes a real difference. So here's your Inner Challenge for this week. Take a moment and identify two ways you could be. Take a moment and identify two ways you could begin embracing an abundant life mindset with exercise. Not what you should do, not what you used to do. Just two small shifts maybe in how you think about movement, how you talk to yourself about it, or how you define what counts. Just two small shifts maybe in how you think about movement, how you talk to yourself about it, or how you define what counts. You don't need to do more. You need to do this differently. I'm so glad you're joining me in this new year on Thursday. On Thursday, no. Thursday, we're gonna have a follow-up episode where we take on the most common obstacles to exercising in midlife and how to move through them with compassion, clarity, and success. Thanks for listening, so I hope to see you on Thursday. Thanks for listening to Creating Midlife Calm. This is one of those episodes where there is a lot packed in. This is one of those episodes where there's a lot of information packed in, so ha. This is one of those episodes where there's a lot of information packed in, so buckle up. This is one of those episodes where there's a lot of information, so buckle up. I think you're gonna enjoy the ride.